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Pearl Necklaces

Pearl Necklaces

a tourist goes into a restaurant Pearl Necklaces in spain and orders the specialty of the house. when his dinner arrives, he asks the waiter what it is. "these, senor," replied the waiter in broken english, "are the cojones, how you say, the testicles, of the bull killed in the ring today." the tourist swallowed hard but tasted the dish and thought it was delicious. so he comes back the next evening and orders the same item. when it is served, he says to Pearl Necklaces the waiter, "these cojones, or whatever you call them...are much smaller than the ones i had last night." "yes, senor," replied the waiter, "you see...the bull, he does not always lose.Quips & quotes Q: How many letters are there in the alphabet? A: Twenty-four, because E.T. went home. Q: What do you call Santa\'s Helpers? A: Subordinate clauses! Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time? A: A dependent Claus.

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mark and paul stopped into an english pub for a drink. they called the proprietor ov pearl er and asked him to settle an argu- ment. "are there two pints in a quart or four?" asked paul. "there be two pints in a quart," confirmed the proprietor. they moved back along the bar and soon the barmaid asked for their order. "two pints please, miss, and the bartender offered to buy them for us." the barmaid doubted that her boss would be so generous, so one of the fellows called out to the proprietor at the other end pearl of the bar, "you did say two pints, didn\'t you?"A number twelve walks into a bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer. "Sorry I can\'t serve you," states the barman. "Why not?!" asks the number twelve with anger showing in its voice. "You\'re under 18," replies the barman.a mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "mom why have i got these huge three-toed feet?" the mother replies, "well son, when we trek across the desert your toes will help you to stay on top of the soft sand". "ok" said the son. a few minutes later the son asks, "mom, why have i got these great long eyelashes?" "they are there to keep the sand out of your eyes on the trips through the desert", "thanks mom" replies the son. after a short while, the son returns and asks, "mom, why have i got these great big humps on my back?" the mother, now a little impatient with the boy replies, "they are there to help us store fat for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without water for long periods." "that\'s great mom, so we have huge feet to stop us sinking, and long eyelashes to keep the sand from our eyes and these humps to store water, but mom ..." "yes son?" "why the heck are we in the san diego zoo?"

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There are two things on earth that are universal: hydrogen and stupidity. There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking. There has been an alarming increase in the number ofHi!! You\'ve reached Janet an wedding pearl necklaces d Chris\'s room. We\'re not in right now. If this is our parents, we\'re at the library studying. Yeah, yeah, that\'s it, that\'s the ticket. If this is John, Chris is out with the girls at the party. Yeah, that\'s it. If thisIt is a violation of the law to sell or distribute drugs or narcotics without having first obtained the appropriate Iowa drug tax stamp. A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public. Looking for more dumb l wedding pearl necklaces aws? Check out DumbLaws.com! Kisse(In a good Australian accent:) G\'day mate. Can\'t come to the phone now because I\'m a bit tied up with this crocodile. Just leave a message, and I\'ll get back to you.

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Demented, screechy voice; black pearl necklace occasional background screams: Hello. Thank you for calling Last Straw Chiropractic. (Raspy gasp.) We can\'t come to the phone right now because we\'re making a couple of adjustments. (Break a few small twigs; big scream.) Plmarine biology researchers have developed a new method to fend off shark attacks. if you are diving and are approached by a shark they recommend that you swim towards it aggressively and punch it on the nose as hard as possible." "if this doesn\'t work, beat the shark with your stump."Three vampires walk into a bar and sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks the first vampire what he would like. The first vampire responds, "I vould like som black pearl necklace e blood." The waitress turns to the second vampire and asks what he would like. ThM&M\'s: The Theory of Evolution Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger,I apply pressure

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Bureau Termination, Law of: When a government bureau is scheduled to be phased out, the number of employees in that bureau will double within 12 months after the decision is made. Brooke\'s Law: Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some fool diCanned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing. Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays. Looking for more dumb laws? Check ou white pearl necklace t DumbLaws.com! Dishes must drip dry. It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own properJohn and Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and Joh white pearl necklace n got pulled over by the police. The officer told John that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. John said, "I\'m very sorry officer, I didn\'t realize it was out, I\'ll1. If I like it, it\'s mine. 2. If its in my mouth, it\'s mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it\'s mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it\'s mine. 5. If I\'m chewing something up, all the pieces are mine. 6. If its mine, it must never appear to be
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